Another excerpt from another email

Date: 09/29/04

London is incredible. I'll have time to travel soon because classes end in 4 weeks and then we start rehearsals that won't take up as much time. I'm going to Italy for sure and hopefully to Paris for a weekend and almost positively making a trip to Ireland to see some friends.

I'm having no trouble socializing and all I just wish there was somebody here I knew (or who knew me rather.) Most people came with at least one other person from their school. I'm doing my best to adjust and it's getting better as time goes on. My flatmates are ... OK. I live with this chick Erin and she's hooking up with this guy I was interested in from the get. His name is John. He's gorgeous and into acting (of course) and catholic :-O. Anyway it's just super weird because he's over and sleeping in her bed almost every night. That's gross to me. There are like 8 people hooking up and I'm like GROSS!!! You don't know these people!!! We've been here all of 3 weeks!!! HELLO!!! I guess part of me is just mad that I don't have somebody all up on my jock ... Whatever! That's not what I'm here for right? Right ... Then Erin's friend from her school Paige is this 18 y/o female who thinks she knows every goddamn thing. I can tell she doesn't have a lot of experience with people of color. Paige's roommate Erin (another Erin) is cool but hella dirty in the kitchen and never washes her dishes. Neither Erin washes their dishes. That's annoying as hell. Then there's the other black girl in the program Esosa. I didn't like her from jump street. She's mean. She's thinks she's right about everything and mad judgmental. The only other flatmate Emily I have no reason to dislike because she's hardly ever there. HAHA! Getting her groove on with her British boyfriend and friends.

Classes are hard work and I'm wiped everyday after classes end. My group always gets crazy schedules because our teachers are working actors and have to rearrange shit all the time so they can go on shoots and to rehearsal and stuff. It's cool but it's insane. Like yesterday we were out at 11:30 and started at 9:30 but to make up for the 3 hours of class that we missed we'll have those hours tacked on to another day. Probably a Friday ... (grrr)

I went shopping for the first time since I've been here yesterday. I successfully turned all my white underwear pink ... like I've never washed clothes before (what is my issue). Living in the flats is basically like living in the dorms. I "make my rounds" every night and see what's going on with other people. Since I'm not involved in the drama I know everythingabout everybody's business :-) As it should be right?It's hard dealing with drama people (including myself) everyday because it's never less than tense in every situation. I love it in the program but will be glad when I come home to SF and can have my sane friends back :-)

I was super sad today because I'm having a lot of trouble grasping theater history and being intelligent in Dramatic Criticism class. It's just me being stupid and self-conscious but I really do feel dumb and inadequate when everybody else can express their thoughts on a particular subject so concisely and I'm all ..."Ummm I liked the show ... I thought it was good." I'm worried when this class comes around. I'm trying not to let it discourage me but dude it fucking sucks to feel like you can't really contribute anything to a conversation about something you should be well versed in. Regardless I am learning much and the program is teaching me lessons of patience andhumility etc. It's really intense.

I've lost weight. I'm back down to a size 12 from my top size 14 since sophomore year started. AND I STILL HAVE 2 MONTHS LEFT!!! If I keep this up ... by the time I see you I'll be a size 6 and ready to wear my first bikini in about 8 years. It sucks though because none of my pants fit and I can stick both arms down the legs of my AE jeans. I figure I need to get money from dad to either buy more clothes or more food ... but anyway enough of my ranting.